Childlike Faith - Part Two of Two

When I was about eleven and my sister was ten we decided to ride our bikes to Dash Point State Park at the West end of Federal Way, WA. It was a eight mile ride and it ended up being a pretty easy ride.

After being there a while it was time to head home. We then realized that the ride home was mostly uphill. Just getting up the hill inside the park looked steeper than we had remembered when we came down.

We had not brought money or food for our trip. We thought about calling my parents collect but vetoed that idea for we didn't want to show failure.

I had not accepted Christ yet but my sister had, she said lets pray about it. She bowed her head while I stared into the sky. She asked for Gods help in getting us home.

A few minutes later our neighbor Mr Nakada and his two young sons drove into the parking lot in their pickup with a camper on top. We hovered at the park for a while to get the nerve to ask them for a ride home, and to give them time to enjoy the time they had come to the park for in the first place.

After a while our tummy's were getting hungrier while the ride home started appearing more and like a mountain leg of the "Le Tour De France".

We finally asked them if they would give a ride home and they agreed. We put our bikes in the camper and the kids jumped up into the sleeper above the pickup cab while my sister and I rode in the passenger and center seat of the cab. We asked Mr. Nakada if he would let us out at his house so we could ride home on our own.

Last week I told my parents about this event.

Childlike Faith - Part One of Two

In July I gave a humor presentation at a talent show, see end of this post for copy of that presentation.

Al Erisman, the retreat speaker, heard my presentation and this week asked me to expand my ten minute presentation to thirty five minutes and speak at a morning breakfast. My talk will be in Seattle at a KIROS event on November 21, 2008.

The title of my talk will be:

Bring Your Child-Like Faith to Work:
Find, Fizzle and Follow.
Planning ahead I decided I needed to put some more childhood stories in my presentation. Here are a few:

While I was growing up my parents started buying Volkswagen buses. We had a 1960 two-tone army green one, a 1966 white over blue and then a 1971 white over red one. The vehicles below are taken from VW websites, not the actual vehicles we had.

The reason I show these pictures is that on each of these rear engined vehicles there is a storage area above the engine and behind the third row of seats. This area we called "the trunk" and my younger sister and I enjoyed riding back there on trips. Actually we enjoyed it unless we were asked or told to ride back there.

These vehicles came in handy for our growing family and we seemed to move a lot. We had moved seven times before I was five, when my parents bought their first house (we moved in Memorial Day weekend 1964).

Shortly after we moved in I was riding in "the trunk" and prayed that we would live in this house forty years. Four years ago my parents had a "homestead" party on Memorial day to Celebrate their forty year anniversary of answered prayer. Today, they are still in that home.

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Back in that day nobody wore seat belts and we were fine to sit in the trunk unprotected. Looking back it was the only prayer closet that if you got in an accident one would become a projectile.

Shorty after that prayer my sister Renee, one year younger, and I were sitting in the trunk discussing life when we discovered that all our older siblings all had younger brothers and sisters, yet we did not. We decided to remedy this and prayed that we would get a younger brother or sister.

My parents were not trying to have children, but my younger brother Irwin was born the following January. When he was born Renee was upset for she told me she had been secretly praying for a sister.

Nine months later my mom was telling the neighbor, Lita Sippy (calling her Mrs. Sippy just didn't sound right) that she was pregnant with another child.

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Lita asked my mom when she had found out and she said "yesterday". Lita then said "that is strange, for your daughter Renee told me three months ago that she was soon going to have a new sister". My younger sister, Ione, was born six months later.

Copied from my July 10, 2008 post titled Tahoe Christian Singles Event

"During the Saturday night talent show I presented the material below:

When I was growing up I was very competitive with my siblings. When I was nine I went to a Bible camp and at an alter call I observed my eight year old sister raising her hand …, so I also raised mine.
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The leader asked the two people who raised their hands to come forward, I felt very uncomfortable as I walked down the aisle. When we got to the front he used us as examples. Looking at my sister he said “some people come to Christ crying” and looking at me, “and some people come to Christ smiling”.
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Three year later at another camp, this time a family camp, at an alter call I was the one crying. My shirt could hardly contain the tears as I moved down the back row, past many other twelve year old boys, and down the long aisle to the front.
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There were approximately a thousand people in the sanctuary as I slowly came forward. When I got to the front a pastor greeted me and asked me to sit with him in the front row and discuss my decision.
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At the exact time I was making the biggest decision of my life, my fourteen year old sister, who was sitting about five rows back, decided to tell me something. She shouted out, loud enough so everyone could hear, “I knew you were faking it”.
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When summer ended I started Junior High School. It was a hard transition for me for I had always been the tallest kid in every one of my elementary school classes. Whenever they took school pictures I was always the token boy in the back row with all the tall girls.
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When I looked around, that first day of seventh grade, I was amazed that somehow I was just an average height kid. This started to bother me enough that I decided that it was something I should bring to the Lord.
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That evening I prayed I would be six feet tall when I woke up in the morning. At the time I had so much faith that God was going to say yes to my prayer request, I slept diagonally on my bed, so that during this miracle I wouldn’t injure myself”.
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Today I am 5' 11" "

"Moving Van" and "Otto Parts" - Part Two of Two

In the spring of 2007 I got reacquainted with Van and have been meeting regularly for lunch and/or coffee and talking occasionally on the phone. He is now married and has four kids.

Van was going on a back packing trip with his oldest son and wanted to get in some hiking before the trip. He called me and said he was interested in hiking part way up Mt Si and would I like to join him, the plan was to go to the 2.5 or 3.0 mile marker. The total Mt Si hike is four miles with a 3,100 foot elevation gain. I invited my 6, 7, 8 and 9 year nephews and niece to join us.

When we started up the hill the goal was to only go part way, but the competitive spirit got the best of us. Our goal soon became to make it to the top. Van took the lead and I was the sweeper.

Trying to keep the children between us was a chore. One kid at a time would fall back and start whining. By the time we got to the top three of the four had taken their turn complaining. After three hours we made it to the top. When they got to the top they all forgot all their troubles and had tons of energy.

On the way down I made the mistake of not telling them that we all have to stay within sight of each other. One of the boys decided he was going to be the first one to the car and took off, the rest of us couldn't keep up with him.

I finally had the oldest boy carry my pack and I took off after the run away. I was worried for his safety and keeping my uncle responsibility. I soon learned that I am not as fast or agile as I used to be. My goal was to catch him and tell him a few things and maybe a spanking. Hikers coming up were yelling at him to stop and then yelling at me for letting him get away.

I didn't have to worry about spanking him for the ground did the work for me. He ran around a couple and fell. When I arrived the couple had stayed near him. We washed off the dirt and put bandages on the knee wounds. He then stayed very close to the rest of us.

At the end of the hike, at the trail head we took the pictures below, (sorry for the picture quality, they were taken on my cell phone). The "run away nephews" didn't want to get into the picture. When he later walked by the same sign I snapped his picture.

Van, two nephews, myself, and niece.

Copy of another Blogger's Post - Sex

Today I read a blog post by "Llama Momma" at
http://llamamomma.blogspot.com/

I decided it needed to be seen by others.

"Monday, September 8, 2008
the one where I talk about sex
Cameras were everywhere on that first day of school. Parents hovered like the paparazzi, snapping photos and waving. And when the kids went in, the crowd dissolved into a mixture of tears and happy dances. (I was one of the Moms doing a happy dance, by the way.)

As we walked home, I chatted with neighbor, who had taken the day off work to commemorate the day. Her husband is a stay-at-home Dad.“What will you do with your day?” I asked. Both of her kids were in school all day for the first time.“Oh, I don’t know,” she said.

“You can go to lunch! You can take a nap! You can have loud sex during the day!” I joked.“Now why would we want to do that?” She asked, as if I had suggested pulling her toenails out one at a time.

To keep romance alive. Because your husband looks good to a lot of bored housewives on this playground. Because you can. I think all of these things as we part ways.In our sex-saturated culture, it seems that married sex is an oxymoron.

Chrysalis is hosting a conversation today on Marriage and Romance.

After eleven years of marriage, I’ve got a few things to say about romance and how it evolves and changes over the years, especially when children come along. But I’ll keep my advice short and sweet: one way to keep romance alive in your marriage is to have more sex.(This is the part of my blog where I try to forget that my dad reads it. And my grandpa.)

But really. Next time your husband winks at you across the dinner table, don’t roll your eyes. Wink back. Marriage is not meant to be a miserable endeavor. Flirt. Have fun. Have sex. And see if the romance meter in your home rises."

"Moving Van" and "Otto Parts" - Part One of Two

In 1989, oh so long ago, I went on a road trip with a friend Van. I knew him from a Church singles group, he is now married and has four kids. Our first Stop was Crater Lake, Oregon.

Then Reno .

Then around Lake Tahoe.

We saw the Ghost town of Bodie, CA.

On the Fourth of July we ended up in the little town of Lee Vining (population 488). This town is sandwiched between Mono Lake and the east entrance to Yosemite National Park (see map above). This town has only two roads, Highway 395 and a parallel, two block long, residential street.

On the fifth of July we would be going through Yosemite and then on to my relatives in San Jose, while Van visited a friend of ours that worked at Mt Hermon Christian Conference Center near Santa Cruz, CA.

The whole reason I am telling you this travel log is this holiday afternoon we had time to kill. We decided to throw a Frisbee to each other on this small towns residential street.

We were throwing it back and forth to each other, neither of us knew how to do fancy throws or catches. and having an OK time. It was kind of hard for I thought, "everyone else back home is celebrating this holiday with picnics while we were filling our time throwing a Frisbee in a rural town in east central California.

Four small local boys, aged 5, 4, 3 & 2, were watching what were doing and somehow what we were doing appeared to be more interesting than what they were doing. Finally the five year old, Jose, asked if we would throw it to them.

None of them had ever thrown a Frisbee before and we began attempting to teach them. We would say "Jose throw it to Roberto", or "Julian throw it to Juan", etc.

They had a lot of trouble with this new toy, their past ball throwing motions made this disc throwing action difficult. Actually the two year old, Juan, was the best thrower.

We threw the Frisbee around with them for a about a half hour when Jose asked us what our names were. I responded, "This is Van and my name is Otto". They started laughing so hard that they couldn't remain standing. They rolled around in the street laughing so hard that they couldn't control their tears. They decided to call us Moving Van and Otto Parts.

We finally got back to throwing the Frisbee and they had the greatest time saying, "Roberto, throw it to Moving Van", "Otto Parts throw it to Julian", "Moving Van throw it to Juan" or "Jose throw it to Otto Parts". They would all laugh every time they tossed the Frisbee.

Our hands were getting worn out from this throwing motion, our fingers were red, puffy and sore. We didn't care for it was so amazing for us to interact with these kids that couldn't stop laughing and giggling. Both Van and I had smiles on our faces as we threw the Frisbee around.

All good things must come to an end and finally their parents came out and told them they were going to be going into the big city of Bridgeport to watch the fireworks that evening. As they drove off they yelled out the windows, "Good bye Moving Van and Otto Parts".

We were disappointed that the boys had to leave, it was no longer fun just throwing between the two of us. We soon ended our game.

We had a wonderful trip but what we most remember was the Frisbee tosses with the four kids in Lee Vining that called us "Moving Van" and "Otto Parts".

Mailbox Peak - Labor Day Hike

A hiking group that I am involved in had a hike planned for labor day to climb Mailbox Peak, about forty five miles east of my home. The posting for the hike said this:

'Says Ira Spring about the hike to Mailbox Peak: "The trail is rough and varies from steep to very steep to awful steep.'

Here is a good article that describes this hike: http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/outdoors/2008016454_nwwmailboxpeak260.html
Here are the hike details:
Distance: 6.0 miles round trip
Elevation Gain: 4000 feet
Hiking Time: 5 hours
Difficulty: Most difficult"

In addition the Washington Trail Association had this to say about this hike:
"Mailbox Peak is not typically the sort of hike that is chosen for the casual hiker's easy outing. The summit, which has an actual mailbox at the top, is reached by a rugged trail that climbs three miles and gains over 4,000 feet, sometimes at a grade as steep as 40 percent.The steep, rugged character of the trail makes it one of the most difficult hikes in the I-90 corridor. Mountain climbers, local hikers and even firefighters have lugged heavy packs up and down for conditioning for decades."

I (Otto) was tentative in attempting this hike. On Sunday I talked with someone who had done it before and my competitive drive kicked in, "If Suzi can do it, I can do it".

Not knowing for sure if I was going to go, I did not drink a lot of water the night before or the morning of.

As I drove to the carpool location I thought "what am I doing". Fortunately the first 1/4 mile is pretty gradual. As I walked this initial part, it gave me that feeling you have when you are going up a roller coaster, with the unknown ahead.

Then the true climbing began, I was the slowest of the crew. The others would kindly take multiple breaks to let me catch up. I soon started quoting the Lord's Prayer to keep myself going. Each step was a huge effort.

I brought along adequate water but consumed it quicker than expected and had to borrow from others, (thanks Rick and Bob). After nine previous hikes this summer I felt I should be able to make this, with only minor difficulty, boy was I wrong.

We finally made it to the top.

Rick took picture



(Bob, Liz, Vic, Eric, Linda, Jonathan, Sara, Mark, Suzi, Nancy and Rick) Otto took picture

It took us two and a half hours to get to the top, and then stayed a half hour for lunch.

I am thinking maybe an hour to get down. To come down I was advised to tighten my boots so my heel was held to the back of my sboot and my toes wouldn't ram into the front. I bent down to tie the left boot, having no problem. In attempting to tie the right boot I slowly fell over. I felt like the Arte Johnson Laugh-In tricycle skit.

On the way down, stepping down rocks and then tree roots was very cumbersome. I learned that "Roots Are Not My friend", the second you touch one your boots become like skate boards. It took us two hours to descend.

Once at the bottom my legs felt like rubber, and they were very sore. That evening my legs became almost useless.

The next day it was hard to keep my balance, my thighs were painful and walking down a hill or stairs sent pain alarms to my brain. Three days later I am finally able to walk without a lot of discomfort.

It will be a while before I do this hike again.

Dear Abby and Ann Landers

In my August 13th post I mentioned Dear Abby and Ann landers:
“I used to collect interesting advice columnists answers to questions sent in (Dear Abby and Ann Landers etc). As their daughters took over their gigs and as time has passed I have found that I rarely read them for the questions and answers are too liberal for my liking.”

Coincidently last night I read an article in the September 2008 Focus on the Family magazine in the “thoughts from Dr. Dobson” section. The title was:

“Dear Abby, What are you teaching our children?
Many of you probably grew up reading the “Dear Abby” column, which appeared in newspapers since 1956. It was originally written by Pauline Esther Friedman Phillips, under the pen name Abigail Van Buren. Phillips retired in 2002, but the column continued under the tutelage of her daughter, Jeanne Phillips.

I’m sorry to report that while “Dear Abby” remains the undisputed champion of advice columns, in recent years, both prior an subsequent retirement, its reputation as a source of solid, homespun, traditional wisdom has been seriously tarnished. In 2007 the Culture and Media Institute conducted a study revealing an ongoing trend toward advice that is steeped in postmodernism and incompatible with biblical teaching. For example, 30 percent of Abby’s columns in 2007 dealt with sex, and 53 percent of those columns offered distinctly nontraditional views on sexual morality.

Specifically,”Dear Abby” does not encourage unmarried adults to abstain from sex, and she rarely finds adultery to be wrong. Abby also fails to tell to tell sexually active teens to cease their promiscuous behavior, and she finds homosexuality to be perfectly acceptable. In 2007 alone, the column also demonstrated a permissive attitude toward a wide range of questionable sexual behavior, including stripping, nudism, and cross-dressing.

The Culture and Media Institute summarized its study of “Dear Abby’s” 2007 columns this way: “as many as 20 million of Abby’s readers are under the age of 18. Millions of young men and women are forming their views on sex and relationships under the influence of a libertine advice and columnist who is advancing anything but traditional values.” For the full contents of the study, see culturalandmedia.com.

Abby reportedly receives more than 10,000 letters and e-mails every week. Her responses run in 1,400 newspapers worldwide every day, reaching 110 million readers daily---nearly three times the combined daily audience of ABC’s, CBS’s and NBC’s news programming. It is regrettable that a column that continues to be revered by millions of readers has, over the years, increasingly embraced the lies of moral relativism. Now, more than ever, those of us who espouse biblical principles must be discerning in the cultural voices to which we listen.”

I had also noticed the same moral slide in the “Ann Landers” column over the years. The original author, Esther “Eppie” Pauline Friedman Lederer (The identical twin sister of Pauline Phillips) morally slid faster and further than her sister’s column. When Eppie Lederer died in 2003 the Ann Landers name retired. Her daughter Margo Howard soon started writing under the pen name of “Miss Prudence” in syndication and in “Slate” on the internet.

The same comments by Dobson about Dear Abby could be applied to Miss Prudence’s advice as well. For many years one of my local papers, The Seattle Post Intelligencer, carried her column. I remember one day thinking, "I can’t read this anymore". Shortly thereafter the paper cancelled her syndication. Frequently, a provocative titled article from “Miss Prudence” shows up on my internet home page, and I ignore it. The few times I have looked at it confirms how damaging her advice is.

Scarlet Letter - Infidelity - Part Four of Four

Even as a single guy I have found the book "His Needs, Her Needs" to be a great read. I have read it multiple times. His basic premise is that if you don't meet your spouses needs they will get their needs met elsewhere.

An on-line Christian bookseller summarized the book:

"It's no surprise - men and women have radically different priorities. Describing the ten most important needs of men and women, Dr. Harley teaches you how to "affair-proof" your marriage. Learn how to sustain romance, increase intimacy, and deepen your awareness year after year."

Her needs:
1. Affection
2. Conversation
3. Honesty and openness
4. Financial Support
5. Family Commitment

His Needs:
1. Sexual Fulfillment
2. Recreational Companionship
3. An Attractive Spouse
4. Domestic Support
5. Admiration

If you don't meet your spouses needs and you spouse strays, his advice for surviving the affair:
Step 1: Ask yourself "do you want to survive the storm?"
Step 2: Don't put up with it another minute.
Step 3: Know what to expect
Step 4: Start meeting each others needs

In the last chapter he says:
"The Cure for incompatibility: Getting Down to the Full-Time Business of Meeting Each other's Most Important Emotional Needs.

The quickest cure for incompatibility and fastest road to becoming irresistible lie in meeting each other;s most important emotional needs. Happily married couples are already aware of this principle and have learned how to make marriages a full-time priority. But these couples not only put out the effort, they also put out their effort in the right places.

I have seen this principle work in many different situations. For example, I once managed a dating service in the Twin Cities area. A dating service is designed to help people with common interests and objectives meet each other. Soon after I opened the service I began to see a very real problem. Those who had enrolled---some five hundred---needed more than an opportunity to meet each other. Almost without exception these people lacked skills in meeting the needs of others. Yet each of them eagerly sought someone else who would be highly skilled in meeting their needs and could care for them. They complained that they only met selfish and insensitive people. Of course they could not see their own selfishness and insensitivity.

So I reorganized the dating service. Rather than than help my subscribers meet eligible people, I helped them become eligible people to meet, developing skills and other qualities that that would make them attractive to the opposite sex.

A number of the dating-service bought in to my new concept and took the pains necessary to become skillful in meeting the needs of other people. For these men and women, my dating service was a roaring success. In fact, they found they no longer needed a dating service to introduce themselves to anyone. Their newly acquired abilities made them attractive to the opposite sex wherever they went. Many of them married within two years.

I believe that our societies failure to train people in meeting the needs the needs of others---especially the needs of the married partner---has caused much of our high divorce rate. Marriage is not a simple social institution that everyone eventually enters into because he or she "falls in love and lives happily ever after". As long as we fail to to see marriage as a complex relationship that requires special training and abilities to meet the needs of the opposite sex, we will continue to see a discouraging and devastating divorce rate.

Children should be trained at a very young age to to learn how to meet the needs and expectations that will be laid on them if and when they enter marriage. There is no reason we must see so many marriages that barely hold together or drift into affairs."

His comments about singles is so true. I see so many others that are looking for someone to meet their needs and not trying to meet the needs of others; I am also guilty of this.

Scarlet Letter - Infidelity - Part Three of Four

Scarlet letter-letters to Ann Landers

I used to collect interesting advice columnists answers to questions sent in (Dear Abby and Ann Landers etc). As their daughters took over their gigs and as time has passed I have found that I rarely read them for the questions and answers are too liberal for my liking.

But here are two from my archives:

Dear Ann: “His Wife in Maryland” had a solution to the problem of infidelity – a common one – blame the Other Woman. This scenario is played out frequently on daytime talk shows. The wronged wife tears her hair and screams at the Other Woman. The husband sits there like the moron that he is and says absolutely nothing while they fight over him.

I find this extremely troublesome. These cheated-on wives should stop blaming the Other Woman. They are not the problem. She is the symptom of a troubled marriage. If a husband is having an affair the wife should look at herself and her husband and find out what went wrong with their marriage. The best way to do this is by talking with a marriage counselor. – Voice of Experience

Dear Voice: I hear you loud and clear. I hope others will, too. You make a lot of sense.
July 7, 1997 Ann Landers

Dear Ann: You have printed many letters about extra marital affairs; here are some things your readers should be aware of:

*About half the men and about a third of the women who are cheating say they are perfectly content and there is nothing wrong with their marriage.

*Being religious does not prevent infidelity.

*Women are as willing as men to have an affair

*Fewer than 10 percent of those having an affair will divorce their spouses to marry their lovers. A large percentage of those who do often have another divorce.

*People who have affairs are more likely to be divorced, distressed and disappointed.

*The chemistry that drives an affair lasts anywhere from a few weeks to three years before it cools down.

Infidelity can happen to anyone. Here are a few tips for your readers to affair proof their marriage. I call it them “the four P’s” for prevention:

*Be protective of your marriage. Avoid risky situations such as long lunches with a co-worker or drinks for two after work. Most people don’t plan on being unfaithful.

*Be positive. Look for what is right in your spouse, and tell him or her daily. People who have love affairs are often looking for appreciation and affirmation.

*Be polite. Always talk with your spouse with respect. Be careful what you say to each other and how you say it. Show courtesy and caring in the way you treat each other.

*Be playful, and make fun, sex and humor a mainstay of your marriage. Schedule times to play with one another, and have a “date night“ at least once a week.

Marriages can and do survive affairs, and many become stronger having weathered the crisis but not without pain and a genuine desire to recommit. – L.S. Ph.D., Seattle

Dear Seattle: thanks for a good letter. Your suggestions for “affair proofing” marriages were especially useful. I am glad you wrote.
October 4, 1997 Ann Landers

Scarlet Letter - Infidelity - Part Two of Four

Adultery - Part Two - More quotes and articles:

Research say that 65% of women and 64% of men know about their spouses fence jumping infidelities. One researcher said "People tend to know what they want to know".

Married woman who admit to pollsters that they have had extramarital affairs, half say, "But only to one man," or words to that effect.

The chances of a husband venturing out is directly related to his income. If morality has anything to do with it, that doesn't show up in the statistics. They indicate, simply, the more money he makes, the more likely he will cheat.

Professor Gwynne Jones of Leads University in England, "one in four wives can be expected to engage in extramarital romance". It's his notion that "numerous women - exposed to so much 'I'm worth it' advertising - have set out to prove they're as desirable as they have been told." Clearly they are.

Women's midlife crisis. A common phenomenon is where a woman in her mid forties, who has never flirted with another man, decides to have an affair. The researchers say a common reason given, "I am tired of trying to be perfect".

Usually, those disenchanted with their marriages first test themselves with convenient partners thereby. Not until they've passed their own tests do they go out in earnest to find partners they might actually marry.

Women in extramarital affairs take them more seriously than men do. Relationships have changed considerably, and they are changing ever. But nothing has happened to change that old generality. Studies prove women are far more vulnerable and far less casual in romance.

One scientist claims that there is only one mammal that has been proved to be absolutely monogamous, the California Mouse. And to think it is in California.

Scarlet Letter - Infidelity - Part One of Four

I have friends, both married and divorced, where their spouses, or ex-spouses, cheated on them. I have also seen this in the work place, with customers, with friends, family and in churches I have attended. The frequency of this subject in the news with politicians, movie stars, athletes, ministers and executives is shocking. Also the amount of time given to this subject on television and in movies, surprisingly given in a positive light, sickens me.

I can't imagine the heartache this causes the families involved. I am also amazed at the ability of these married people to find willing partners. Just today an aspiring politicians career was shot down by a past affair.

Today's post will be from my articles and statistics file, collected on adultery, some of the below saddens my heart:

Newsweek quote, August 11, 2008 issue:
"In a divorce filing, Alex Rodriguez says his wife's claims that he is a cheater are "immaterial." Legally? Maybe. In the court of public opinion?, nope"

Fox News 08/08/08 reporting on John Edwards infidelity with Rielle Hunter:"He told ABC News that he didn't love Hunter, 42"

Depending on the study, the percentage of partners that stray has been around:
Men: 25%
Women: 15%
A recent study said the average for both men and women is now 23% so the incidences are rising.

Literary lady Jessamyn West: "For a woman, there are no 'great' lovers. there is only the man she loves. And she does not have to be a mathematician to feel that the more he is a 'great lover' the less he is hers"

In a twin study, if one twin exhibits infidelity, the other twin strays 55% of the time, higher than the national average.

In wives that stray, 42 percent of them commit their extramarital misdeeds during less than one year of their marriage.

Multiple scholars say that primitive man was promiscuous.

Decades of research say that infidelity healing is very difficult but a wife recovers more quickly than a husband in the same straits. It is almost invariably more difficult for a husband than for a wife to recover after learning the spouse has been unfaithful.

When a husband or wife is unfaithful, "it's the husband who's most likely to admit the infidelity later"

If a mother needs help with the kids, the father tends to stay with her to give that help. If she doesn't, he doesn't. It's a scientific claim about all animal species: The male is usually monogamous, if the woman is reliant, and usually polygamous if the female is self-sufficient".

Adultery has been taboo and severely punishable in almost every society for one simple reason, says a sociologist. In an uninhibited free-love culture, it's difficult - sometimes impossible - to fix responsibility for the care of the children.

The writer Ben Hechtsaid said he has known a lot of men that chased women, and he has concluded that most of them were looking not so much as more bedroom activity , but for more masculinity in themselves. He said, "they were fellows of dubious lust."

More information coming in part two, three and four

Women's Intuition - Bible

Below is a rough draft of one of the subjects in my intuition chapter of the book I am working on: "The Brilliance of Women, based on the 144 women in the bible who made brilliant decisions"

Maidens going out to draw water - I Samuel 9:6-14

Each afternoon the young girls in each Israelite town would get water for their families at the community well. This was a chore but also a social time for all the girls to connect with their friends and discuss the latest events in town.

During one of these trips, they were greeted by two men, one a tall, handsome and distinguished young man (the future king Saul), and the other appeared to be a family servant, who were looking for a lost donkey.

The men asked the girls if the prophet Samuel was in their town. “‘He is’, they answered. ‘He‘s ahead of you. Hurry now: he has just come to our town today, for the people have a sacrifice at the high place. As soon as you enter the town, you will find him before he goes up to the high place to eat. The people will not begin eating until he comes, because he must bless the sacrifice; afterwards, those who are invited will eat. Go up now; you should find him about this time’ (NIV)”.

Whenever I read this portion of scripture it always amazes me that the girls knew all the goings and comings of Samuel. My thoughts are that if the two men had run into a group of young boys, they would have had no clue where Samuel was. Even if he had run into a group of men they probably would not know all the things these girls noticed.

In a similar fashion whenever I am confused about something in a store I always ask a random woman in the aisles for advice. I remember asking a women’s advice on what to bring to a potluck I was going to, I still get compliments on the four hummus dip and flat breads I bring for appetizers. Another time I ran into a woman I knew at church and she recommended chips with a lime dill flavor, that her husband love’s, I am getting raves for that also.

When I am shopping for my house asking random women advice has had amazing results. A few years back I had my bedroom painted and bought new bedroom furniture; my comforter now did not match my bedroom makeover.

Going into “Bed Bath and Beyond”, paint can and a drawer from my dresser in tow. With the help of their sales clerk we picked out a cover that matched the can and the drawer. We put the can and drawer next to the Duvet cover and the clerk told me it was a perfect match. I thought it looked pretty good, but felt the clerk might be biased toward her store, I felt I needed a second opinion.

I eyed a woman, a few years older than me, walking down another aisle and I went over and asked if she could give a woman’s opinion. I got the feeling I had made her day as she followed me back to my display.

She informed me the colors I had picked out “were perfect…IF YOU WERE IN JUNIOR HIGH.” She told me a cover at Macy’s, across town, would look fabulous. She even told me to go down the escalator and head left toward the corner and it was a “Ralph Lauren Home” brand. It amazed me that she knew all this. She also said if you have a bed with side boards use a fitted sheet over the box spring.

I immediately went to Macy’s and purchased a comforter cover and two sets of sheets, of what she recommended. The next day I came back to buy a third set and the clerk told me that an Asian man had bought “absolutely everything” right after I left. She said the Asian guy was upset that “the blond guy” had beaten him out of some of the store’s stock.

It still amazes me that this random woman, just off my paint can and drawer front was able to know that bedding across town would be perfect. Whenever I have people over and they pick up their coats off my bed they always comment at how great everything looks.

With assistance from sisters, girlfriends, female friends and random women in the store aisles, they have made my home a showplace. I have had people ask, “Are you sure you have never been married” and others have made comments to the effect I decorate better than the guys that play for the other team. I always respond “I get a lot of help”.

Host Dude

I was at a BBQ last Sunday and a woman from my church told me one of the last two pictures will be used to recruit host families for the "Reaching Japan for Christ (RJC)" conference held at our church each spring.

The pictures are from George, one of the guests in my home. In Georges Blog http://public.fotki.com/georgekchow/2008/ he said:

"Feb 21, 2008
Tony and my host dude, Otto, for the RJC conference! He picked us up from the airport, hosted us for 3 nights, drove us to and from the conference and we had great fellowship time together. Thank you Otto! Please come visit us in Columbus anytime!"

All the other attendees were hosted by couples or families. With me being a single guy, Tony and George started calling me their "Host Dude".

I had a great time having them at my house. It was great to be with fired up young Christian men serving the Lord. Tony is a Neat-Nick and George is an extreme people person. I look forward to hearing what ministries they get involved in.

When I saw the above pictures my first reaction was "I am going to have to ask for heavier guys next year" standing next to them I felt heavy, I think the most either of them weighed was 130 Lbs. I felt a little like Shrek in the pictures.

Small World Situation:
The interpretor for this conference was a Japanese missionary's son, Roger Olsen (see first picture). Roger's dad Jim went to seminary with my dad. On my parents first date, a double date, Jim Olsen was one of the other young people(62 years ago).

Ethics

At The Tahoe Retreat the speaker, Al Erisman, talked on bringing your faith to work and Ethnics. He did an excellent job and I enjoyed getting to know him and his wife, Nancy; they were fun people.

During one of the sessions he handed out a list titled:

Ten Practices of Ethical Business Leaders

1. Each person matters. Give attention to each person as an individual.

2. Don't objectify people. Give each person room to grow and change.

3. Call each person by name, with respect.

4. Demonstrate commitment to good work and good rest.

5. Honor the families represented by those that work for you.

6. Provide a safe working environment.

7. Keep your promises.

8. Be fair and just in financial matters.

9. Be open and honest in all communication.

10. Avoid the temptation to take credit for the work of others.

He then told us that these were taken directly from the Ten Commandments.

Tahoe Christian Single's Event

Over the fourth of July I went to a Christian Singles event at Lake Tahoe with 92 others. I had a great time. I was in charge of small groups , the whitewater trip and hiking. It was a lot of work but it was a lot less work that what other leaders did.

During the Saturday night talent show I presented the material below:

"When I was growing up I was very competitive with my siblings. When I was nine I went to a Bible camp and at an alter call I observed my eight year old sister raising her hand …, so I also raised mine.

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The leader asked the two people who raised their hands to come forward, I felt very uncomfortable as I walked down the aisle. When we got to the front he used us as examples. Looking at my sister he said “some people come to Christ crying” and looking at me, “and some people come to Christ smiling”.

-

Three year later at another camp, this time a family camp, at an alter call I was the one crying. My shirt could hardly contain the tears as I moved down the back row, past many other twelve year old boys, and down the long aisle to the front.

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There were approximately a thousand people in the sanctuary as I slowly came forward. When I got to the front a pastor greeted me and asked me to sit with him in the front row and discuss my decision.

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At the exact time I was making the biggest decision of my life, my fourteen year old sister, who was sitting about five rows back, decided to tell me something. She shouted out, loud enough so everyone could hear, “I knew you were faking it”.

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When summer ended I started Junior High School. It was a hard transition for me for I had always been the tallest kid in every one of my elementary school classes. Whenever they took school pictures I was always the token boy in the back row with all the tall girls.

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When I looked around, that first day of seventh grade, I was amazed that somehow I was just an average height kid. This started to bother me enough that I decided that it was something I should bring to the Lord.

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That evening I prayed I would be six feet tall when I woke up in the morning. At the time I had so much faith that God was going to say yes to my prayer request, I slept diagonally on my bed, so that during this miracle I wouldn’t injure myself”.

-

Today I am 5' 11" "

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After the above I got a lot of praise for how well my presentation went. The biggest praise I got was from the speakers wife who asked if I could give a similar presentation this fall in Seattle.

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During the conference I came down with a nasty sore throat. I pushed through the weekend and made it home fine.

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I realized I hadn't taken any pictures while away (the raft picture above is a stock picture).

On Monday I slept 14 hours and had a 100 degree temperature. By Wednesday, yesterday, the fever was gone and my other symptoms are now abating.

Weekend With Three Nephews

Last Friday and Saturday, I had three of my nephews over, aged 9, 7 and 6. We had a great time.

I over planned the time. The first thing on our agenda was to go on a round trip five mile hike to Carbon Glacier along Carbon River in Mt Rainier National Park. It is about an hour drive from their parents house.

This is a hike I took many times as a kid and a few times as an adult. It has been over ten years since being up there.

I didn't check the conditions before leaving (I am a guy) so didn't realize that the spring rains and flooding of Carbon River had washed out the road and most of the former trail.

Instead we parked at the ranger station at the entrance to the park. We chose to hike to a waterfall 3.7 miles up the road. Thinking the trail is flat and follows mainly the road I thought "no problem". Little did I realize small bodies have a little trouble with this distance (7.4 miles).

Joel, the seven year old brought his own pack. He was well prepared for he had a lot in there. When I asked why he had a library book and a Dr Seuss book from home, he said "I brought them in case I got bored".

The start of Mt Rainier is out of this picture on the right. It is one of those situations that you are too close to see much of the Mountain anyway.

These makeshift log bridges, made by the Rangers, were our method of getting over Carbon River. We had to go over four of these to get to the base of the waterfall. Every winter these log bridges get washed away and they build new ones in the spring.

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The water running in this river is Glacier fed and looks like a mixture of 1/2 chocolate milk and 1/2 water. The water was probably 34 degrees. Walking across this bridges, with the cold from the river and the heat from the sun, gave you that feeling you get walking from the parking lot into an air conditioned mall on a hot summer day.

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One of the boys panicked on the third bridge so we headed back; we saw the water fall from a distance. Nathan, the nine year old, took my big pack and the other boy took the small pack and I carried a 53 lb boy across three bridges.
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Then we headed back. The younger two started whining about the distance. Five minutes each on Uncle Otto's back and we made it back to the car. Then off to McDonald's in Enumclaw WA.

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We then headed to, a closer to home, "drive to" waterfall, Snoqualmie Falls. They wanted to go down the trail to the base and Uncle Otto deferred for another time.

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We then headed home for Croquet and basketball. It was the first time they had played croquet and the rules seemed strange to them.

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We then shot baskets on a 6' 6'" hoop in my driveway. Then Apples to Apples before going to bed. Dale hasn't learned to read yet so he chose not to play. His brothers says he usually throws cards in blind and ends up winning.

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One of the boys was extra clean that evening. I think he drained the city water tank with this one shower.

Saturday we went Putt-Putt golfing next to a country club. The night before some prankster put dish soap in the decorative waterfall and stream running through the course. There was white bubble foam everywhere. A couple times we had to run back to the club house to get new balls for the foam covered anything close to the stream. I have lost golf balls before but never in foam.

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We had a territorial view of Lake Washington, Mercer Island and downtown Seattle as we hit golf balls on an 18 hole grass putt-putt greens. There were no wind mills at this Putt-Putt facility.

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I didn't know one of the boys was left handed until he attempted to use the back side of the putter. Back to the club house we went for a "lefty" club.

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They had trouble with "the farthest from the pin hits first" rule. They felt that whoever hit the best shot should go next. We finally got that rule under control.

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One of the boys was having the most trouble with this game, he even once pounded his putter into the ground in frustrations. I gave him a warning and he settled down. Like a typical golfer he finally hit a great shot on hole 15 and then said, "I am pretty good at this".

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Another trip to McDonald's and then off to the "Kung Fu Panda" Movie. At about three that afternoon, they were back to their parents and their sisters.

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Things I heard all weekend:

"It's my turn"

"Can we eat at McDonald's again?"

"Can I have this?"

"Can I wind up the Grandfather clock?"

"You look like our dad".

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One time comments:

"Can I pee in the shower?"

"Can we climb out your sun roof?"

"Why do you have the same last name as us?"

"You're too old to get married"

"Don't you have any bubble gum toothpaste? This adult toothpaste tastes terrible"

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This past week, I think my brother and sister-in-law are tired of hearing about their son's "Uncle Otto" weekend.

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Uncle Otto took a few days to rest up from this weekend.

In the World But Not of the World

Last weekend I decided to attend a secular singles event. I heard about it from a woman I met at a business networking luncheon. I passed it to a friend and we recruited others. The others couldn't make it so I went with my good friend Laurie.
It was a unique evening. As we were looking for parking all we saw were well dressed women and no men. When we got inside it was pretty close to the same, maybe 300 women and 50 to 60 guys.

I don't know if others of you get this feeling when you go into a Casino but those were the feelings I was getting as I was there that evening. Like this isn't where I belong

Fortunately the first two women I met were Christians: I was probably 15 to 25 years older than them. I talked with them for a long time and then Laurie joined us. One of these two gals said "it is like a boob fest around here".

I felt out of place as I talked with others; I talked with a few women I knew through my Christian circles. They wished they hadn't come. Other than them I didn't meet any other Christians.

What was hard was the MC for the evening was a 6" black woman, who used to be a man. He/she had a woman's figure and had a "potty mouth". This person had picked a stage name of "Poisoned Waters"; this name was so fitting.

It was difficult to listen to him/her. Most of the audience was very accepting of this person.

The celebrity portion of the evening were local sports figures, TV news anchors or weather people, actresses and business owners. They had collected donations from local businesses and the audience bid on a date with the celebrity along with the donated items.

The first Package went for $500 and the last package went for $5,200. There were a lot of sensual overtones to the auction. With the ratio of men and women being skewed, the women bid up the men dates way beyond reason.

One bright spot was a local TV weather woman who made it clear she was a Christian. The items she had collected were also amazing. I didn't plan on bidding so I was too slow on the draw with my number "901". I felt they prematurely closed bidding on her package. That segment was then over.

Then the evening got tacky. Three firemen volunteered to be auctioned off to the highest bidder, It became like a "Chip and Dale" routine. Then two women volunteers to be auctioned off for dates. The overtones to this portion got bad, I started getting ready to leave.

After attending this I decided I need to be more ambitious in my Christian circles and stay away from these secular events. I also plan on staying away from places that give me that "Casino Feeling"

I received a group of pictures from someone connected to this event. The picture below was the only one I felt was conservative enough to post. The others showed a lot of skin. It was held in empty space on the 35th floor of a Seattle downtown high rise.

What gives you that "Casino Feeling'?

Picking Partners, Part II

Here is more information about picking partners:

Multiple studies show that women prefer tall men. Most conclusions in these studies talk about height being connected to resource potential.

According to David Buss, University of Michigan, author of "The Evolution of Desire", he asked 10,00 people in 37 different cultures what they considered most important in choosing a mate. He found that that everyone is looking for a partner who offers the best shot at successfully producing offspring. Age of a woman and resources of a man, that he is willing to share with her and the offspring, play a large role in mate selection.

Quoted in the book "Blink" (2005)The average American male is 5' 9", 14.5 percent of all men are 6 feet or taller and 3.9 percent of adult men are 6'2" or taller.

Quoted from WIRED in the July 2008 Readers Digest, "In the world of online dating , a five-foot-eight-inch man has to make $146,000 more a year than a six-foot-tall man to get the same number of dates."

"Marrying Up" and "Marrying Down"
Historically, if you "married up," you married someone taller, older, richer, or better educated than yourself. Most women married up, by choice. Fittingly, most men preferred shorter, younger, poorer, or lesser-educated partners, so "married down." People generally now reject such class distinctions, They say they want to "marry sideways," or words to that effect. Current studies indicate the the "marry up" and "marry down" patterns still exist. It also shows that women, not men, do most of the matrimonial choosing.

According to John Money: John Hopkins University, by the time we are eight years old, our "lovemap" has already started, "the pattern for our ideal mate has already begun to float around in our brains"

In picking cars the saying goes, "women buy chassis and the men buy engines". When it come to women and men picking mates, women buy engines and the men buy chassis.

The more education a woman gets diminishes her chances of marriage. Studies show a highly educated woman , if typical, doesn't want to marry a not so educated man, if she can help it. So when looking over potential mates, she finds fewer eligible men to choose from.

"A man falls in love with his eyes, a woman through her ears". British journalist Woodrow Wyatt said it . His aged belief, not uncommon, holds that a man is attracted to a woman by what he sees in her appearance. but a woman is attracted to a man by what she hears - from him and others - about his personality and status.

My (Otto's) summary of "Getting the Love you Want" by Harville Hendrix, PhD. We are attracted to those that are similar to the parent we have the most difficulty with.

Similar to the above, a counselor friend told me, "95% of the time you will marry a person that is like your problem parent."

Sincerity: look for this in a mate; if the person doesn't have sincerity none of the rest means much.

Picking Partners, Part I

I have a file titled "Picking Partners" with articles, quotes and statistics. There are too many for one blog posting so I decided to break them out into two or three. More coming soon.

Turkish proverb, "Who seeks a faultless friend remains friendless"

Love and War authority Theodor Reik said no woman is ever really surprised by a matrimonial proposal. Nor even by any sort of romanic overture. The female of the species always sets the sex stage, except in criminal behavior, for either stop or go. And she usually rehearses the proceedings in her mind.

When two stangers meet, a man and a woman, it's the woman who decides whether they will speak. Even if she doesn't speak first, she let's him know . With a glance, a smile, a gesture. -LM Boyd, Seattle Times.

Women pick men, men pick types. when a woman recalls the loves of their life, she may well realize none of her men were like any of the others. When a man looks back, though, he often sees a distinctive similaritiews in girlfriends of his past. Some others claim, most, though, just match up with someone they accidently meet and, then try to make it work.

Oscar Wilde, "Men always want to be a woman's first love; women like to be a man's last romance."

Seven out of ten women prefer the appearance of men, "clean-shaven", according to most recent surveys.

In a Stanford study, highly emotional women and highly intelligent men commonly fall for each other.

At the University of Pennsylvania they studied over 10,000 daters and found that what people said they were attracted to and what they were actually attracted to were way different. Most knew "it" almost instantly, when they saw it. Men and women, when assessing compatibility, within moments of meeting, using primarily cues of height, weight and attractiveness. The researchers were surprised that religion, education and income played very little roles in their choices.

At the University of Liverpool, researchers found that we are attracted to people that look like ourselves or like our families. Call it narcissism but when men and women viewed digitally altered human faces they were drawn to the familiar. This may explain the common phenomenon of couples looking like they could be siblings.

Barbara Ehrenreich, "Personally, I can't see why it would be any less romantic to find a husband in a nice four-color catalogue than in the average downtown bar at happy hour."

Family Bible Camp

I spoke with my parents this week and they talked about their summer schedule. The last week of June they will be going to family camp for their denomination. This is the same camp I went to when I was a kid. Back then it was always over the fourth of July, we went to family camp at Warm Beach Camp (now called Warm Beach Conference Center).

With fireworks banned on the grounds of the camp, firework displays were only things I heard about from others or saw on TV. When I finally saw a fireworks display it was 1976, the bicentennial year. That display was so huge that every year since I have been disappointed.

Back to Bible camp, below is a poem I wrote when I was 18:

WARM BEACH FAMILY CAMP

Stanwood, WA

-Every year we come to camp and see all of God's beauty, everything looks so luscious

And to prove to others that we could all make sacrifices, we left at home our electric toothbrushes.

-When you are a counselor at camp they tell you the rules and then they give you liberty

And then they put you in charge of of eight young men who are going through puberty.

-The A-frames are OK but they are not the greatest sensation

It is nice they keep out the rain but have you ever tried to sleep with flow through ventilation.

-Every year we would come to camp, mom, dad, and seven children, in a VW van, it seemed so far

Every year I would ask my dad, "dad, when are we going to get a real car".

-Every year the pastors would get up on front of the folks

And then insult every one's heritage by telling Norwegian Jokes.

-At every meal we would sing the table prayer, as a small child I would close my eyes and move my lips

And pray to God I wouldn't get on KP for these Norwegians don't leave any tips.

-The food at camp has been pretty good, except for that one year where the cook quit and head groundskeeper took control

That year it was really sad, the food took it's toll.

-That year we all agreed the food was pretty poor

All I noticed that they did a bang up business at the candy store.

-Every year they had the married/singles softball game

You never knew who would win and the score was rarely the same.

-The young women would root for the men that were single

for they were the men that made their hearts tingle.

-Over time they change their tune

But that is normally after they have been on their honeymoon.

-Every year I would fill out the camp registration form and sign my name with a pen

And every year I would have to to ask my mom, "how in the world do you spell the Lutheran Brethren?".

-Whoever designed Cedar Lodge must have been pretty clever

It's a nice building but if you had to go to the bathroom you would have to walk forever.

-They should be ashamed, why they put the bathrooms so far away, they made a huge mistake

For many times as a child, on the long walk, I came so close to making my own lake.

-Memories of camp lingered in my mind all year long, the fond memories I couldn't dodge

For example whenever I smell coffee it reminds me of Cedar lodge.

-We always hated to see it end but Sunday came and we all had to go home

I have also reached the end here, for this is the end of my poem.

Hawaiian Guests

A year and a half ago my friend Jim married Valerie from Hawaii, they had met in college, 33 years previously. This past week, for three days, I had Jim and Valerie and five of their friends from Hawaii stay with me. They were on a ten day vacation, one of the goals was to tour universities for seventeen year old fraternal twins, Kameron and Micah.

We went to an afternoon Mariners game, with the stadium full of people playing hooky from their jobs, toured the University of Washington, (I am an alumnus) went to Jim's family gathering, had lots of great food and played games until late.

I was surprised by some of the differences between their lives in Hawaii and mine in Seattle. They had trouble drinking water for it was so cold coming out of the tap. Also Kameron had to buy long pants for the trip. One of the men, Chad, asked what the big machine was in a hall closet, I told him it was my furnace. He asked where my air conditioner was and was surprised when I said I didn't have one.

In my house I have white towels on all the towel racks in my bathrooms, these are for decoration and for guests. Most of my guests wanted to use my everyday mix-matched towels over the pretty white ones.

Having them here gave me a perfect deadline for getting household projects done. The night before they arrived I finally caulked the shower in my master bedroom. It had been a year since I had removed the old caulk. It took me two hours, procrastinating a year on a project that finally takes two hours, wow.

The morning before they arrived I cleaned out the ashes from my wood stove fireplace insert. I put the ashes in a thick black plastic bag and put the bag in the garbage can in the garage. I had left too much air in the bag so the lid of the can wouldn't close. To deflate the air I put a small hole in the top of the bag to let the air out.

With this scent of ash on my clothes and the ash aroma in the garage, their was no convincing Chad that I didn't smoke cigarettes. He had no reference to fireplace ash smell so there was no way I was going to win that argument.

A month before they arrived, I ran water in my laundry room utility sink and then left the room. When I heard sounds that sounded like a waterfall I ran down and saw water everywhere. I used every towel and rag in the house to clean up the water. Some of the water went into the adjacent guest room. I soaked up the low spots and ran fans for a couple of days.

A few days latter the room smelled of mold and mildew. I also realized it had had a mild smell of this for a while. Seattle usually doesn't have much problem with mold and mildew because of our moderate temperatures.

The next week entailed removing carpet and pad, then two coats of chemicals and then four coats of sealer. Then I had to touch up the walls and then new carpet and pad were put in a week ago Friday. The room now looked fabulous.

The carpet then had a strong carpet rubber smell, it smelled like a tire store. The carpet people assured me that the smell would go away in a few days. It was almost gone by the time my guest arrived.

I had a great time during their visit. I promised Jim and Valerie I would visit them in Hawaii within the year.

Childhood Testimony

When I was growing up I was very competitive with my siblings. When I was nine I went to a Bible camp and at an alter call I observed my eight year old sister raising her hand …, so I also raised mine.

The leader asked the two people who raised their hands to come forward, I felt very uncomfortable as I walked down the aisle. When we got to the front he used us as examples. Looking at my sister he said “some people come to Christ crying” and looking at me, “and some people come to Christ smiling”.

Three year later at another camp, this time a family camp, at an alter call I was the one crying. My shirt could hardly contain the tears as I moved down the back row, past many other twelve year old boys, and down the long aisle to the front.

There were approximately a thousand people in the sanctuary as I slowly came forward. When I got to the front a pastor greeted me and asked me to sit with him in the front row and discuss my decision.

At the exact time I was making the biggest decision of my life, my fourteen year old sister, who was sitting about five rows back, decided to tell me something. She shouted out, loud enough so everyone could hear, “I knew you were faking it”.

When summer ended I started Junior High School. It was a hard transition for me for I had always been the tallest kid in every one of my elementary school classes. Whenever they took school pictures I was always the token boy in the back row with all the tall girls.

When I looked around, that first day of seventh grade, I was amazed that somehow I was just an average height kid. This started to bother me enough that I decided that it was something I should bring to the Lord.

That evening I prayed I would be six feet tall when I woke up in the morning. At the time I had so much faith that God was going to say yes to my prayer request, I slept diagonally on my bed, so that during this miracle I wouldn’t injure myself”.

Today I am 5' 11"

Hairpiece Experience

In a previous post (Lawn Distraction) I shared about hair loss and Rogaine. In one of the comments I said I would soon share about wearing a hairpiece; so here goes:

From the age of 20 to 23, I wore a hairpiece, (three and a half years). Actually I ended up buying two of them.

First of all you need to realize that the raw material (human hair) used for wigs and hairpieces is best if it is not sun or environment damaged. With this need for undamaged hair, most hair used in this process is made out of hair from Asia. Culturally untanned skin and unbleached hair is in style. Only the unsophisticated would allow themselves to be exposed to the sun.

The reason I tell you the above is my first hairpiece was made out of thick straight black Asian hair died blond, parted on one side. It made me look like the Elf that wanted to be a dentist in the "Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer" TV special.

During this time if a woman looked at me I couldn't tell if she was flirting with me or if she was looking at my "piece".

I had many unique experiences then I wore them but three stand out:

*Church basketball League - one night as I was dribbling the ball across the top of the key the defender took a swat at the ball and missed. Basically I was going east and my hair was going west.

The other players couldn't figure out what was on the court and kicked it to the sidelines. I ran over and picked it up and threw it into my nearby coat and went back to playing ball like nothing had happened. The ref called a jump ball because they couldn't figure out what happened. I soon became an outside shooter.

*Basketball again - I was playing hoops in the culdesac in front of my Seattle cousins house. Three of the four clips that attached the piece to my natural hair came loose. It dangled from one clip off the side of my head.

My cousins and their neighbors laughed so hard, we had to stop playing for the day.

*Cleaning "the piece" - Even though my first one cost approximately $600 and my second one was closer to $800, I was too cheap to buy one of those Styrofoam heads to store and/or dry it with. I would store and dry my hair over a soccer ball.

Unlike natural hair you don't wash your hair every time you take a shower. You treat it more like a hat and wash it every two to four weeks. It was a royal pain to carefully wash and dry this thing and then put it on a round shape to dry. One time my girlfriend, who lived with her parents, gave me wig shampoo.

Using this shampoo I wasn't as careful as I was with regular shampoo. When I went to dry it I couldn't get a snarl out of the middle of the part. With normal hair your last resort is to cut out the snarl, with a hairpiece you can't cut it out, it won't grow back. I struggled for hours trying to get out the mess in my part. At 3 AM I finally went to bed.

The next morning I called in sick to work, saying "I hadn't slept well". Telling the total truth by calling in with a "bad hair day" excuse would not have worked.

About an hour later I got the snarl out and went into work mid-morning. I just told everyone I came in because I felt better.

With my girlfriends urging I soon stopped wearing my hairpiece. Looking back I unfortunately let her marry someone else.

I still have both hairpieces in a drawer, one looks like a sleeping small dog and the other keeps my rarely used soccer ball warm. I sued to be able to wear them for Halloween but the longer haired styles of the early eighties makes them not blend in with my short hair

Mary Magdalene and the other Women at the Tomb

On Saturday morning I had my last leaders meeting of the year for my men's group. We have been studying Matthew and this week was on the last chapter (28) about Jesus' resurrection. When the subject of women at the tomb came up, one of my friends and other leaders, Mickey, said "Otto knows a lot about these women".

I said a few things about them in the group and then later looked them up in my notes. I know a lot about these women but am a little rusty on having information immediately. Here's what I have on them:

Mary Magdalene:
Basically a former neurotic (seven evil spirits) released from torment by Jesus. Her name has been maligned by early leaders in the church who incorrectly tied her to the sinful woman in Luke 7:36-50.

She is from the town of Magdala, today called Mejdel. It was a prosperous city on the most western shore of the Sea of Galilee. It was on the major trade route between Egypt and Damascus.

She is probably a prosperous widow and might have had children running her deceased husbands businesses back in Magdala.

She followed Jesus, contributing support, out of gratitude and love for what he had done for her.

Whenever she is mentioned she is always listed first or right after Jesus' mother Mary. This either is because of her significant role or she is the oldest of the women listed, she might even be older than Mary.

If she was an unmarried women or a young widow she would probably be living with her parents or one of her brothers; and if she had small children she would not have been able to follow Jesus.

There is no way she is the women described in popular books, painting and movies.

Mary the Mother of James (Greek form of Jacob) and Joses (Greek form of Joseph):

We know from Matthew 10:3 that James was the son of Alphaeus. Alphaeus is from the same Arabic name as Clopas or Cleophas, (Not to be confused with Cleopas, road to Emmaus disciple).

This James is called "the less" or "the little", because of his lesser role compared to the more famous James of James and John, or this James is short in stature.

Salome, Wife of Zebedee: She is the mother of the apostles James and John. Many scholars believe there is a possibility she is Mary's sister. This would make James and John Jesus' maternal cousins. This has been disputed for centuries.

Joanna: Wife of Chuza, house-steward of Herod, probably a high paying position. Jesus healed her of sickness or an evil spirit. Out of her gratitude and love for Jesus she followed and contributed support.

Lawn Distraction

Another distraction from writing and blogging.

Last August I used either the wrong chemicals or they were too old and killed a quarter of my grass. I have been painstakingly fixing the patches. This has become my new exercise program.

It has been a cold spring here in Seattle (snow in late April?) and the new grass has been slow in popping through. When it came up it had that tennis ball fuzz look, for too too long. I am waiting for "mowable" grass. I have to keep mowing the good grass next to the patches without disturbing too much of the new growth.

It reminds me of my Rogaine attempts twenty years ago. I wanted combable hair, not peach fuzz. I finally gave up with Rogaine because I found people were more attracted to a confident man losing his hair than with an unsecure man with a full head.

"Personals"

In a study done in Cincinnati, in the early 90's, "Women understate their weight by an average of five to ten pounds and understated their age by an average of three years. Men also understated their age by three year and overstated their height by two inches.

In a three city investigation, of those that used personal ads to meet members of the opposite sex, 35 percent of them were already married.

A study of applications at dating services show men most frequently want to meet women that are attractive, warm and at least five years younger. And women look for men that are ready to make a commitment, successful and taller.

Photograghs in personal ads benefit the sender more than the receiver. The common response, "she/he's seen my picture and is still willing to go out with me. Amazing!". Or something like that.